Love is A Special Feeling
by Mysterygirl256
Summary: In this story Tsukasa finds out he is accually a girl and is keeping the sercret to herself. Crim helps Tsukasa out and then falls in love but will Crim ever find out that the girl he helped was acually Tsukasa?
1. Tsukasas First Kiss

**Hello! This is my 1st .hack/sign Fanfiction. I know this paring seems weird but on my levels I think its fine. It might not be by best but I still worked hard on this. If you can already guess the paring it is Tsukasa x Crim. **

**I do not own .hack/sign.**

"Tsukasa, are you listening to me?" asked Mimiru. Tsukasa stops thinking about what Bear said. "What were you thinking about?" asked Mimiru as she sat down. "Nothing, I was just thinking about when Bear asked if I was girl" said Tsukasa. "When I first met you I thought you were girl as well. You did have big eyes like a girl and you didn't act like boy at all" said Mimiru. "But what made you change your mind?" asked Tsukasa. "When you said you were a boy I believed you but I still think of you as girl. You're kind of like a little sister to me and well later on your attitude did change when you got your guardian but I still stick to what I believe" said Mimiru. "Well it was nice talking to you" said Tsukasa as he left. Tsukasa is sitting right next to the bed and then he hears the voice again. "Tsukasa, what are you thinking about?" asked the voice. "I just want to ask you a question, am I a girl?" asked Tsukasa. "Well Tsukasa let me show you" said the voice. Tsukasa sees a small little girl walking to school. He snaps back. "Was that little girl me?" asked Tsubasa. "Well you have to face the facts, she had amethyst eyes and beige hair" said the voice. "What will my friends think when I tell them this?" asked Tsukasa. "You have a choice to tell them but you also have a choice not to tell them" said the voice. "I'll just keep it as my secret for now and hope for the best" said Tsukasa.

It's the next day and Tsukasa, Mimiru and Bear are running from a monster. "Shouldn't we just stay and fight?" asked Mimiru. "You can but if you do you will die" said Bear. The three of them find 3 different paths. "It might be best of us to split up" said Bear. Tsukasa and the others split up. While Tsukasa is running he trips and his hat falls off. Now you can see that Tsukasa's hair goes just above his waist. (I'll be writing he for now until the others find out about the secret) "Excuse me miss but do you need help?" asked a voice. Tsukasa looks up and sees Crim. Crim lends Tsukasa a hand. "Thank you" said Tsukasa. "You look familiar, have I seen you before?" he asks. "Um...Sorry but you must be mistaken" said Tsukasa. Tsukasa knows if Crim finds out it's him, Crim will tell everyone or possibly lock her in the dungeon. "Well bye" said Tsukasa waking away. When Tsukasa get near the end he puts his hat back on. "Hey Tsukasa, what took you so long?" asked Mimiru. "I accidentally tripped" said Tsukasa. Later on when Tsukasa is gone Crim meets up with Mimiru, B.T, Subaru and Bear. Crim looks like he is on cloud 9. "Crim, hello are you there?" asks Mimiru. "Oh sorry, I just spaced out" said Crim. "Are you in love?" asked Subaru. "How can you tell?" he asked. "I've known you for along time and spacing out in your case means you are in love" said Subaru. "So who I the girl?" asked Bear. "I met her in the forest. She had beige hair and amethyst eyes" said Crim. "Maybe you should ask Tsukasa if he knows her. Tsukasa does have the same color hair and eyes" said Mimiru.

Crim is walking around hoping to find Tsukasa but he knows it won't be easy. He knows that Tsukasa hates him because he locked him in the dungeon. Crim then sees Tsukasa. "Tsukasa, wait up" yells Crim. "Stay away from me, I don't want to go back to that dungeon ever again" said Tsukasa. "It's nothing like that. I just want to ask you a question" said Crim. Tsukasa stops running and Crim goes up to him. "Do you have a sister?" asked Crim. "No but why do you ask?" said Tsukasa. "I met this girl in the forest and I was wondering if she was your sister since she had the same eye color and hair as you" said Crim. "Sorry but you must be mistaken, I don't have sister" said Tsukasa as he leaves. Crim remembers those words from the girl he met and grabs Tsukasa's hand. "Tsukasa, were you at the forest today?" asked Crim. "Yes now can you let me go" said Tsukasa as he was trying to get away from Crim. "Tsukasa, take off that hat" said Crim. "No way" yelled Tsukasa. Crim pulls it off his head and her hair drops down. "You're a girl" said Crim in shock. "I don't care what you think, just let me go" yelled Tsukasa. Crim lets go of Tsukasa's hand but puts his arms around her. (I'll be writing she when Tsukasa with people who knows that she is a girl and write he when Tsukasa is with people who don't know yet) "Let go of me" she yelled. "Tsukasa, why didn't you tell me that you were that girl in the forest" asked Crim. "That is none of your business so let me go" said Tsukasa. "Fine I'll let you go" said Crim. He kisses her on the lips. When Crim lets her go, Tsukasa slaps him. "Never do that again" she warned him.

Crim is sitting in the Crimson Knights headquarters drawing a picture. Subaru shows up and sees the mark on his face. "Crim, what happened? You look ridiculous with that mark on your face" laughed Subaru. "Remember that girl I told about. Well when I kissed her goodbye, she slapped me" said Crim. Subaru starts to laugh. "No wonder she slapped you." said Subaru. "What do you mean?" asked Crim confused. "You don't know anything about girls; you can't surprise her with a kiss so early. I bet she won't talk to you for month for what you did" said Subaru. "I guess but she can't hide from me for that long" said Crim. "Oh by the way did you find out her name. You just can't call her she all the time" said Subaru. "I did but I don't think she wants other people to find out" said Crim. Tsukasa is sitting down thinking about what happened. "Why did he do that and what was the purpose of what he did?" asked Tsukasa. Tsukasa then hears the voice again. "Tsukasa, that was your first kiss and don't be confused about it. Crim just wanted to express his feelings to you" said the voice. Tsukasa is sitting down in the meadow trying to get her mind clear when B.T shows up. "Hey Tsukasa, what are you doing here?" asked B.T. "I'm just thinking about something" said Tsukasa. "You can tell me, I won't tell anyone" said B.T. "What is the purpose of a kiss?" asked Tsukasa. B.T. looks at him strangely. "Well is kiss symbolizes the feelings of love. If you get kisses by someone it means that they care about you but why do you ask" said B.T. "Since you can keep a secret I'll tell you. Do you remember the girl that Crim was looking for…..well that girl was me. I'm actually a girl and when he found out he kissed me and I didn't know what it meant" said Tsukasa. "I would guess that Crim has feelings for you and wants to express it to you" said B.T. "Thank you for your help but please don't tell anyone" said Tsukasa. "Don't worry" said B.T.

**Remember to Review**


	2. The Secret Revealed

**Hi! Here is chapter 2 to my story! I never thought this story would get so many reviews! If I can ask, how did you find this story?**

**I do not own .hack/sign.**

**ninofchaos- I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**redsilhorses- Yes, Mimiru and the others will find out that Tsukasa is a girl. **

**joe- I just updated this story and the enxt update will probily be in a few days. **

Katreda- Thnk you for the tip about my writing so here is the next chapter.

Tsukasa is going to meet the others but before she gets there she sees Crim with them. "Don't worry, I told Tsukasa to come so you can apologize" said Mimiru. Tsukasa hears this and she thinks everyone knows her secret. Just as she turns around she sees Sora. "Hey, Tsukasa where are you going in such a hurry, Crim wants to tell you something" said Sora as he pulls Tsukasa toward the others. "Let me go, I don't want to talk to him" yelled Tsukasa. The others push her towards Crim. "About the dungeon thing, I'm sorry" said Crim. Tsukasa is surprised that she hears. "I guess it wasn't your fault" said Tsukasa. "Good, now we are all good friends" said Mimiru. "Tsukasa, don't you have to apologize to Crim about what you did" said B.T. Tsukasa knows that she had to apologize to Crim about when she slapped him but she didn't want to do it in public. "Maybe we should leave them alone" said B.T. Everyone leaves and Tsukasa and Crim are all by themselves. "I'm sorry about slapping you yesterday" said Tsukasa. "No worries but why didn't you tell me or any of the others that you were girl?" asked Crim. "Actually, the day you….well kissed me……..was the day right after I found out" said Tsukasa.

Mimiru and the others are spying on Tsukasa and Crim. "What are those two saying?" asked Mimiru. "I don't know I can't even hear a thing there saying" said Bear. "Maybe those two are talking to each other about there feelings" said Sora. "What are you talking about?" asked Mimiru. "I heard of the rumor as well. They said that Tsukasa and Crim have fallen for each other" said Subaru. "But that can't be possible, Tsukasa is a boy" said Mimiru. "Not according to the rumors. A player said that they heard Tsukasa saying that he was girl" said Subaru. The rumors are indeed true" said B.T. Everyone turns around and looks at her. "Do you have proof?" asked Sora. "Yes but I promised Tsukasa that I wouldn't tell anyone" said B.T. Sora takes out a rare item. "Yesterday Tsukasa was in the meadow and then he told me that the girl Crim was looking for was her" said B.T.

"I guess that is proof" said Mimiru. "Next time can you tell us when there is news" asked Sora. "You weren't even supposed to know. I promised Tsukasa that I wouldn't tell anyone" said B.T. "But I guess it was obvious, Tsukasa aren't like the players we regularly know of" said Subaru. "But what are we supposed to do, now that we know Tsukasa's secret?" asked Bear. "We could pretend we don't know but in most movies when people come up with that plan, it always fails" said Mimiru. "We could try, its better than just telling Tsukasa that we know her secret" said B.T. "Okay but we have to make sure we don't give any clues" said Subaru. "Didn't you hear what I said! It always fails!" yelled Mimiru. "Well that's the only plan we have now so let's just stick to it" said Sora. "Well I don't care, I'm telling Tsukasa I know her secret and that is that" said Mimiru walking away. But before she can even take one step she is pulled back by Bear. "If you do tell Tsukasa, you know that she might unleash her guardian against us" said Bear. "Good point, but what are we supposed to do?" asked Mimiru? "Let's just keep quiet and maybe B.T. is lying or we can just let Tsukasa tell us" said Sora. "Hey I never Lie!" yelled B.T. Everyone hears Sora and B.T. argue and both of them let out a breath.

"If you guys don't cut it out, Tsukasa might find out" said Mimiru. "So Tsukasa what do you think about me?" asked Crim. He tries to put his arm around Tsukasa's shoulder but she sends her guardian after him. "So far, no" she said commanding her guardian to attack. You can see Crim running all over the place trying to dodge that attacks. Tsukasa starts to laugh and then the guardian disappears. Mimiru and the others are watching Tsukasa laugh and then fall on the floor. They are shocked that Tsukasa actually laughed. "I have never seen Tsukasa laugh before" said Bear. Crim helps Tsukasa up. "You looked so funny when you were running around" laughed Tsukasa. "I've never seen you laugh before" said Crim. "I usually don't like to laugh" said tsukasa leaving."Was what I saw true?" asked B.T. "It was, I saw Tsukasa laugh too" said Bear.

After Crim and Tsukasa finish talking, she goes looking for the others. Tsukasa sees them hiding behind the tree. "What are you guys doing?" asked Tsukasa. Everyone jumps up in surprise. "Oh nothing, we just wanted to see if you forgave Crim after he locked you up" said Sora. "By the way you laughed, I would say you forgave him" said B.T. "I….I…just thought…he looked funny when he was jumping around" said Tsukasa. "Why did you attack him?" asked Sora. Everyone was trying to get Tsukasa to confess that he was really a girl. "He tried to put his arm around my shoulder" said Tsukasa. "Why did he try do that?" asked Subaru. Tsukasa is getting annoyed. "Ok, I'll tell you why. It's because I'm actually girl." said Tsukasa. "It's okay, we already know. B.T. told us" said Mimiru. Tsukasa looks at B.T. "I'm sorry but, I had to tell them. Besides they are your friends" said B.T. "I guess its better you guys know" said Tsukasa. "So are you and Crim together?" asked Subaru. Tsukasa starts to blush. Crim pops out. "So how are you doing, honey?" asked Crim trying to put his arms around her. Tsukasa gets annoyed and then slaps him. "For the last time, don't every try anything like that ever again" said Tsukasa walking away. "Honey, please wait" said Crim rushing after her. "Don't ever call me honey" said Tsukasa. Everyone starts to laugh. "I guess the chances of Tsukasa repaying Crim's feelings are unlikely" said Mimiru.

**Please review and thank you to all my readers!**


	3. A Spell To Destroy Myself

**Wow! Eight Reviews in only 2 chapters. That beat my old record! I guess I found my best topic. For all of you .hack/sign fans I wanted to tell you about a new book out. It's called .hack/AI BUSTER. It's coming out in late August and it's so exiting. I went to Tokyopop and read the summary and its probity one of there best work's ever. Well here's my 3rd chapter. **

******mattskateboarder-Sorry to tell you this but I'm not sure what you are saying can you plz explin it to me and maybe then I'll get it. ****  
redsilhorses- I was going to make him popout randomly but then I totally forgot. But i'll try to do that if I can remember.**  
**  
Katreda- Thank you for saying that my story is "cuty" but I don't think that this chapter will be happy or "cuty" **

ninofchaos- Thank you for catching my mistake. I fixed it now. Thank you.

I do not own .hack/sign.

Crim is in the Crimson Knight's headquarters again talking to Subaru. "Next time I think you should listen to her or else you will get slapped again" said Subaru laughing. "Maybe I'll just stay out of the way until she calms down" said Crim. Back on the meadow Tsukasa is talking with Mimiru again. "So what do you think of him?" asked Mimiru. "I don't want to talk about it" said Tsukasa. "That's just like you. If you hate someone you don't talk about it" said Mimiru. "But…..it's not that I don't like him" said Tsukasa. "So you like him but then you hate him" said Mimiru. Tsukasa nods her head. "Well it's almost time for me to go to bed. See you tomorrow" said Mimiru logging out. "Somehow he's nice but somehow I don't like him because he disobeys what I say" said Tsukasa. "Well, well, well, Little Tsukasa has her feelings messed up" said Sora popping out. "Can't you leave me alone for a while I need to think" said Tsukasa walking away. "Well just to let you know Crim is looking for you. I guess he wants to say goodbye before the days over" said Sora. Tsukasa stops for a second. "Well just tell him to go away" said Tsukasa running away. When she finally stops you see tears running down from her eyes. "I can't ever show my feelings. We can't ever be together. I'm stuck here and I can't leave so what's the use. But I feel pain when he's not near me but this is my only choice" said Tsukasa crying.

Tsukasa then sees someone in front of her. She looks up and sees Crim. "So this is where you went" said Crim with a smile. "Crim please just leave, I already had enough for today" said Tsukasa running away. Tsukasa goes back to the place with Aura. "Why can't we be together?" asked Tsukasa. "I guess it's just not meant to be" said the voice. "Somehow I need to get rid of all these emotions" said Tsukasa. "That is really simple. Here is what you will need" said the voice. A piece of paper floats down and there is a symbol. It is a circle and inside is two triangles. The triangles are overlapping and upside down from each other. "Just draw this symbol with your staff and stand in the middle. Then when the light appears step inside and all your troubles will be gone" said the voice. "I understand" said Tsukasa. "But you must do this before 12:00 noon because when it is 12:00 that is when the light will show" said the voice.

It is 30 minutes before noon and Tsukasa is drawing the symbol. You see Mimiru looking at what Tsukasa is drawing. "Hey Tsukasa what are you drawing?" asked Mimiru. Tsukasa hands her the paper she got from the voice. Mimiru looks at the symbol and then leaves. When she is walking Subaru taps her on the shoulder. "Mimiru can I see what you are looking at?" asks Subaru. "Tsukasa was drawing this on the ground" said Mimiru handing the paper to her. Subaru looks at the paper and then her eyes widen. "What is it?" asked Mimiru. "This is part of a spell that was banned from The World. It caused many major problems because it was used accidentally and almost killed the person using it" said Subaru. "That means- Oh no we better find Crim he has to know" said Mimiru. Tsukasa has finished drawing the square and she is waiting for it to be noon.

"What are you saying?" asked Crim. "Tsukasa is trying to kill herself" said Mimiru. When the 3 of them arrive you see the yellow light. "Tsukasa stop please" yelled Crim. "Sorry but I don't want my feelings anymore" said Tsukasa stepping in the light. "But it doesn't get rid of feelings. It kills you" said Subaru. You see red ropes around Tsukasa and she is being squeezed by them. "AHHHHH!" yelled Tsukasa. When Tsukasa's eyes finally close the ropes let go and the light disappears. She falls on the ground but she doesn't look like herself. She is now wearing black and her hair is also the same color. "Tsukasa, wake up please" said Crim lifting her up. There is no response. "How do we get her to wake up?" asked Crim. "I don't think there is a way" said Subaru. "Then I'll destroy myself as well" said Crim. "It's not possible, it only works for Wavemasters" said Mimiru.

Tsukasa's soul was sent to another place and when she wakes up she sees a place of darkness. "Where am I?" asked Tsukasa. Another girl approaches her. "You are on a bridge of Life and death. If you keep going straight ahead you will fall into deep darkness but if you go back you will be alive but controlled by darkness" said the girl. "Is there a way to avoid both options?" asked Tsukasa. The girl shakes her head. "I'm sorry but there are only two roads that I know of" said the girl. "Then I'll go back" said Tsukasa. Back in the world Tsukasa opens her eyes but you can see her eyes are blank. "Tsukasa you're back" said Crim hugging her. Tsukasa's wand turns into a knife and stabs Crim. "Tsukasa what are you doing?" asked Crim. She summons her guardian and it starts attacking him. "Tsukasa please stop" he said dodging the attacks. Tsukasa runs after him and when she catches up she stabs him with the sword once more. She then stops and prepares to attack again.

**Sorry this chapter is sad but please review. **


	4. The Reson and The Desision

Thank you or the reviews and the questions! One question can make a story better bit by bit. So this is going to be a great chapter! (At least I hope) But there is a little problem because they cut .hack from my cable so I don't have any new info to base on until it comes back on.

**I do not own .hack/sign.**

**Kyree sprite of Woods- Thank you for adding me to your favorites list! That makes me happy. **

Katreda- I guess it isn't so sad now that I've reread it but when i first writng that chapterI had tears coming from my eyes.  
**  
Redsillhorses- I wasn't really sure about what Mimiru and Subaru where doing so I just made them try to figure it out. You'll know what I mean when you read the 1st sentecne in this chap. **

mattskateboarder- I know the neww .hack book is great but it turns out there is 2 bad news about it. First thing is that it isn't able for preorder till August 28th. The other bad news that it's not a manag book but who cares. It still sounds good to me.

While Tsukasa was trying to "kill" Crim, Mimiru and Subaru were trying to figure out why they weren't targeted and then they came up with an answer. (Not a good 1st sentence is it?) "Maybe it's because Crim ignored Tsukasa's commands every time she gave him one" said Subaru. "That is possible but wouldn't that mean that Tsukasa is going to hurt him -counting how many times he ignored her- five times?" asked Mimiru. "Yes I would suppose so but that would cause a lot of damage to Crim" said Subaru. They look over to see Tsukasa who was going to attack again. "Tsukasa please wake up" yelled Crim as he ran. "You must be kidding me, I'm wide awake" said Tsukasa summoning her guardian. The guardian catches up to Crim and attacks him. Crim turns around in pain and sees that Tsukasa is still covered in black. (Hair, eyes, dress, hat, staff) "Crim just hurry up and log out" yelled Mimiru. "Good idea" yelled Crim as he was heading for the chaos gates. He logs out but before he leaves, he tells Mimiru and Subaru to keep an eye on Tsukasa. "We can't stay here all night. We might as well ask B.T to come and make some sort of barrier" said Subaru.

When B.T. comes back with the others, Tsukasa was gone. "Now where did she go?" asked Mimiru. "I'm not sure but I think she'll be fine. As I heard, they say the player regains conscious" said B.T. logging out. Mimiru and Subaru follow and logs out as well. B.T. didn't know that she was only part correct. Tsukasa regained her conscious but couldn't control what she was doing. Tsukasa walks up to a blade master, long arm, heavy blade, and twin sword. "Well, a little girl all alone in the dark, aren't you scared of the monsters?" laughed the twin sword. "For your information I have no intention of fighting. I'll just leave that to my guardian" said Tsukasa. "You must be joking. The only person who has a guardian is Tsukasa and he surely isn't a girl" laughed the blade master. (Her hair is long right now) "Oh yeah, wanna bet" said Tsukasa lifting up her wand. Her guardian shows up and kills the long arm.

"Um...can't we talk about this?" asked the heavy blade. Inside Tsukasa is starting to cry because she knows what she's doing is wrong. "Sure here's a deal, you don't tell anyone that I'm a girl and you live" said Tsukasa. "No problem" said the other players. Then the sun starts to rise and Tsukasa losses conscience. Everyone logs back in after what they read on the message boards. "We better go find her. The message board said that Tsukasa has killed 4 players (you can guess what happened)" said B.T. "I would guess that your guess was incorrect" said Mimiru. "Tsukasa must be looking to find Crim and then destroy him" said Subaru. "That's true but you know she also kills people who don't listen to her' said Bear. Just then Sora pops in. "So have you heard. Little Tsukasa is now a killer" he said. "Yes we heard but are you going to help?" asked Bear. "Nah, I rather just go and have some fun exploring" answered Sora jumping away.

"I think we should tell Crim not to sign back on for a while' said Mimiru. "But it's a bit to later for that. I saw Crim just a few moments ago. He was looking for Tsukasa" said Subaru. "Is he crazy? He'll get himself killed again" said Mimiru. Crim in looking around in the meadow and then spots Tsukasa sitting down. "I knew you'd find me. It's less trouble" said Tsukasa standing up. "I know you're not Tsukasa but before if you do kill me. Can you at least tell me why she cast a spell on herself" asked Crim. Tsukasa smiles. "If you didn't know already, she already liked you. But since she was stuck here, she could never we with you in real life. So she knew the only way was to get rid of her feelings for you. But then she didn't know in order to do that she also had to give up everything else" said Tsukasa. "But if she gave up everything why are you trying to kill me?' asked Crim. Tsukasa takes her wand and points it to Crim. "in order for her feelings to be gone. The 1st thing we have to do is get rid of the persons he loved most. Then after that she will be back to her normal self" she said.

Just then everyone shows up. Crim grabs Tsukasa's staff and hands it to Subaru. "Why are you all here?" asked Tsukasa looking around her. "We know a lot about you Tsukasa and we also know you don't fight without your guardian" said B.T. "We looked up info on the spell and there is a way to get the old Tsukasa back" said Bear. "But 1st we need to wait until the sun sunsets" said Subaru. The sun slowly starts to set and then Tsukasa regains conscience. "Now what are you going to do?" she asks. Inside the real Tsukasa is wondering why he friends where surrounding her. "Tsukasa, are you there?" asks B.T. The real Tsukasa tries to answer but can't. "We know you want to give up your feelings but do you want someone to be killed because of it," asked Mimiru "According to this dark side of you, they are going to get rid of your feelings but they can only do that if they kill the person you care most about."

**I wonder what Tsukasa will do now. I obviously know but I'm keeping that a secret. I also know that this chapter was kinda boring and sorry for that. Please review!**


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